There is a lot to say tonight....
I want to start by saying this isn't a political blog....hang in to the end...
I don't know if you have noticed the insanity happening in our world lately....
I can't stop thinking about it...
People keep telling me to stop...
I think that's the worst advice I've been given...no offense.
It's also impossible...
The big things happening in our world...like cutting health care...
Those things affect me...
...and not just emotionally.
Did you know the poverty line in the United States is $24,000?
I make 5,000 on average a year.
I keep hearing this "complement" from people....
"Ugh! You're so lucky you get financial aid!"
You are right. I am lucky.
If I didn't have financial aid, I wouldn't be able to eat, or go to the Dr., or pay bills, or have enough to pay my rent...
Oh, also, for the first time in like 3 years, I'm not technically homeless...so there's that...
Also, I can't just get an apartment...or a car....you have to have credit...or someone with credit to help you sign for that...but you can't build your credit unless you are paying for things...or get a credit card...
cause you have to have credit to get a credit card....
But dang it....I sure am lucky to go into debt a few thousand dollars more every semester.
Did you know 4% of people ever make it out of their economic status?
It must be from all that debt, we are so lucky to get.
But it's my choice right?
If I just work hard enough at my studies, one day, I'll find a magical job that will help pay off my super lucky debt, to help me finally go into more lucky debt, to pay for a stupid lucky credit card and lucky car, and lucky house.
DO YOU NOT SEE HOW LUCKY I AM??????????
I'm not writing this blog to make you feel bad!!
I am writing this because I want you all to see that not all of us are lucky enough to have a choice.
The phrase "pull your self up by your boot straps" is bull shit.
You have to have boot straps to pull yourself up by in the first place.
The American Dream is bull shit.
You have to have a dream that fits the nice little box the government hands you!
Not everyone is freely given the choice.
When we as people start deciding who gets to eat...
and who doesn't...
We all lose.
When we decide who lives or dies, we all lose.
When we decide who's perspective, story, voice, or pain matters more than anyone else, We all lose.
When we give money more power, we all lose.
When we decide who is worth loving and who is not.
We all lose.
When we decide someone is better than someone else....we all lose.
When we base the intelligence of a human being on their political leanings and affiliations...we all lose.
When we call the old president the devil, and the pray for the prosperity of the president elect...we all lose.
When we decide who gets access to health care, we all lose.
When we decide who can buy a cake from us and who can not, we all lose.
When we decide who can enter our country and who can not, we all lose.
When we decide who can come to our church and who can not, we all lose.
When we decide that the way to handle a peaceful protest is with freezing cold water in freezing cold temperatures, we all lose.
When we roll up our windows and don't look at a homeless person on the street corner, we all lose.
Do you see?
I can give you story after story....
I can give you inequality after inequality...
and you can tell me to stop talking politics...
But these aren't politics any more, friends.
These are people's lives.
This is your life.
This is my life.
The reality is we only get one choice in this life, and it is how we let our circumstances define us.
I know I always say how tired I am...
But I'm exhausted.
I'm tired of hearing about my muslim friends at school getting their hijab's torn off their head.
Or hearing about my friends who are gay, who happen to really love Jesus, being told their relationship with him isn't real.
I'm tired of watching people who don't live in poverty complain about their Starbucks order.
I'm tired of riding the bus and feeling like a 2nd class citizen because I don't have a car.
I'm tired of my friends becoming homeless and other people who have never been in that situation say "Well, you just got to work harder."
I get it, friends. We limit ourselves.
But that's the point!!
WE LIMIT OURSELVES!!
We make sure each other is doing what we are supposed to!
We hold each other accountable based on our own conceptions on what life is supposed to look like!
What if we stopped governing each other, and we began encouraging each other to see the world in a different light?
What if when someone was mean to us, we challenged the status quo and responded in love??
What if instead of refusing to make a cake for a couple who are gay, you made them two cakes and showed up at their wedding with champaign and smiles, reminding them both how loved they are!?
What if we simply smiled at that homeless person on the corner and told them they were loved.
What if the man that killed 9 people was told he was loved?!
What if instead of looking at money as the key to all things, what if you took away it's power and realized that the power of this world is actually in the people who love the world?!
What if you stopped looking at the world like it's a bunch of shit politics and you realized it's a bunch of broken people that need to be loved?!?!
What if you realized that not everyone is capable of pulling themselves up by their bootstraps, and maybe you could give them some boot straps, and then maybe help them pull them up?!!
It takes a village to be a person.
It takes a village to make it through the winter.
It takes a village to remind each other that they matter and are worth it.
This isn't political.
This is about people.
This is about what we believe each other deserves.
A drug addict still deserves a cup of water.
The people with the shitty attitudes that come through my Starbucks store and yell at my barista friends, still deserve to be loved and respected, and we don't get to decide they don't.
There is a power in loving those around us.
There is power in fighting through the things we are scared of.
It's midnight.
I am sitting in my bed, writing this blog because I had an anxiety attack.
There's a lot happening in this world.
There are a lot of things happening in my life.
I am scared of most of it.
I'm not good enough, strong enough, smart enough, quick enough, spiritual enough...
I don't work hard enough, think quick enough, act well enough, sing perfectly enough, love people enough, eat healthily enough....
I'm scared, of failing, succeeding, opening up my heart, making friends, falling in love, meeting new people, being hurt, getting lost....
I almost didn't register for classes this semester because I was scared of what would happen...I didn't do all too well last semester.
But the point isn't perfection I suppose, the point is is that we show up, we love people, we love ourselves, and we don't with hold love, from anyone...including ourselves.
I am so lucky to have a village.
I am so lucky that my entire life, someone has come along and reminded me how loved I am.
I don't know how to end this blog except to say...this isn't politics...this isn't about money...this isn't about social justice and your opinion on who get's what, that's not your opinion to have anyway....
This is about life...
It's the only reason we exist.
We exist because of love.
So what are you doing with your life....?
